Saturday, August 27, 2005
@10:35 PM
life comes and goes, and when it all ends, it's not the number of years you have lived or the number of qualifications that you have that matters. it's how you lived these years.
don't you think you have really gone too far? all of us believed, or rather, we forced ourselves to believe that you will one day accept us as your squadmates. but no. you have not. its been 8 months. a whole 8 months. and your attitude is getting from bad to worse.
all of us have seen the pack of lies you have given. you are not lying to us. you are lying to yourself. you know that you can do it. but you just does not want to put in the effort. you are as fit as all of us, or maybe, even fitter. you can run 3.2km in ease, but you cant even endure one round of pt? you can play squash with your classmates, but you cant walk/run during act? you can talk and laugh and walk with ease, but then during act, your muscle will tear? you are perfectly fit during lessons times, but then before act you will suddenlt have a oh-so-terrible stomachache. dont you think all those lies are just so ridiculous?
we thought you would change for the better. but its just getting worst after every act. we thought that the blame lies on us. we thought that its because we didnt let you join in thats why you feel left out. we thought that its our fault when you dunno your drills. we thought that we would be able to make you change. we thought that when you change, we would become a one, big happy squad.
however, we are wrong.
dont you at least feel a tinny winny bit of guilt? i think you should.
you have your own groups of friends. so do we! but at least we make time for both squadmates and classmates! but you dont! when a whole group of us are eating in the canteen, you will only be seen with your classmates, you dun even bother to come to us and say hello or whatsoever. what kind of attitude is that? when we went to say hi to you, all you do is just give us a so-reluctant nod and walked away as if nothing happens. when we call you and tell you some important stuff, you will give us the so-impatient voice, as if you will wither or die away if we talk for one more second.
do you know that all of us are just so tired of you? most of us are giving up, maybe you will feel much much happier that way.
you dont come for squad meetings. you dont come for squad recesses or lunches. squad meetings are pulled forward because of you. but you dont even bother to give us a call or whatsoever to inform us that you are not coming. its very obvious that you are free on that particular day. very. some really cannot make it. and we have never ever blamed them before. but you? i can bet that you didnt even bother to ask your parents to let you go, because you would not want to go in the first place!
what had made you stayed on till now. i am sure the last on the list is squadmates and the first on the list is cca points. you know how much cca points npcc can earned you, thats why you stayed back. why stay on if you dont have the passion?
we are all so tired.